RATATOUILLE

That's you and me kiddo !! Today and always

If I am worried about being forgotten after I died? I don’t think I will be. I’ve got so many people who have been involved with me in close, intimate ways. And love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone.

I have no problem living let alone dying. Sorry if this bugs you, but hey it bugs you because you are looking out for me.

My beloved Alexandria Isabelle, I probably do not have much time left to tell or guide you but no worries, my spirit of loving you lives on… whenever you miss me, come talk to me, though I might no be able to respond but I promise I’ll listen or another thing you can do is reach down your heart and you will find me there. I will always be there to love and hug you forever and ever.

Reason being I never like raising you with punitive methods because when I was your age or probably younger I got beaten up real bad, I know the burning sensation of getting caned can be real traumatize. It hurts not only physically but mentally to a child as well. So I banned and never believed and never wanted to apply the same child raising tactic on you. So that now you know…

Your present changes everything, you taught me how to live better, how to gain self-confidence, self-motivate, so on and so forth. You have saved me from making a whooping of mistakes and have certainly transforming me from a weak little woman to the person you called super hero today….hahahaha, funny how a child changed and saved my life…

Alex, I believe I have by far set an excellent parental modeling to you and I hope you could at the very least be strong and yea life can be real tricky at times, is a two edged sword regardless which way you turn it cuts both ways. This is a mixed blessing thingy, life can be both a blessing or a curse depends on what you choose, but all in all….life can be real easy and simple if only you adopt an open mind, set minimum expectations to the point of none preferably, and must always remember to have a lot common senses, and common sense is not something you can learn from school or institute. You need to look at people around you, let their weaknesses be your strength, let their failure be your success. All these will help shape you. Life is a great lesson and I hope you will make it till the end.

I want you to know I am already very proud of having you as my daughter regardless whether you will eventually make it to Yale is immaterial. I know you hate it when uncle Alfie said “let’s just hope that pita would not end up in some secluded china province Ya-Le” hahahaha sorry I can’t help laughing, he is just too funny.

Life is not about proving to anyone or the world of what you are capable of doing, life is about having a sense of contentment, so you will not be sway easily by influences, you will not react to the unnecessary critics. People can say anything, you can never changed people the only thing you can do is change your mind-set. Live your life in the eye of storm then you are certainly to be alright.

I have lived a full life pita, because I have a peace of mind many people yearn so in a way I already have everything, I have no regrets. My departure is just part of life nature, now remember what I’ve said, do not cry over something we cannot change, tears are precious thing my love, this is why you don’t find me crying. Not that I am a less human beings, just that why cry? When you face your utmost challenges all you gotta do is be brave and think of what must you do next and keep moving forwards, at the end of the dark you will see lights, and it can only get brighter every minute. It can be hard..but be rest assured it will pass before you know it.

I will always be around watching out for you kiddo, that I promise. So have fun with your next stage and next and next and you’ll see life is always beautiful and worth living for.

Thank you for being my daughter Alex, and I love you today and always. Here is a song I wish I can sing to you myself, but as you know my voice is kinda suck, so here it is.. I dedicated this song to you.. something for you to remembering me by.

Greatest Love Of All

I believe the children are our are future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be
Everybody searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone to fulfill my needs
A lonely place to be
So I learned to depend on me

[Chorus:]

I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all

I believe the children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be

[Chorus]

And if by chance, that special place
That you've been dreaming of
Leads you to a lonely place
Find your strength in love

p/s : your dad is a great man, tho we did not quite make it we parted due to irreconcilable differences but all you need to know is that he loves you very much, give him a chance and I hope you two make peace with each other. Then I will find myself dying with a great grin on my face...

With lots of love

Mother